Apology

So I’ve realized that I’ve  accidentally turned my blog into a place for me to vent out my frustrations. Clearly I’ve not been having a great couple of weeks. It seems my step mother brings out the worst of me- every damn time. Anyways the point is. I’m in Vectors and I’ve realized that I’m not too sure I want to be surrounded by cancer patients all day, or research all day. Mr. K, my awesomely magical Chemistry teacher told me that I should go into project management. I don’t know about that but no matter what I do with the rest of my life- I want to always be involved in environmental awareness and activity so I don’t really know what I’m going to do now. I actually thought I’d never have to go through the cancer thing all over again, but I am- and I LOVE ENVIRONMENTAL SCIENCE. I really love it and I’m so passionate about it- it honestly pisses me off when people disregard our home. But at the same time, there is a TON OF PEOPLE I will be disappointing because I won’t become a doctor. But at the same time, you don’t understand how badly I want to be part of environmental research! I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I’ll write up soon.

i NEVER THOUGHT

I always knew I didn’t fit in. I could go from being the girl who just hung out with everyone in every group, to being the tag along in every group. It never mattered. I knew I didn’t have too long here, I didn’t think I’d survive for this long anyways. Sometimes I think its better not to survive. I’m no suicidal, just thinking about the lack of burdens. Sometimes I feel like I can hear them thinking, “Why is she here? Why can’t she go around with someone else”. I don’t really care anymore. I don’t really know. I know that as soon as I get to Switzerland, I have to do this all over again. Another 10 groups I’m –not- part of. I don’t really want to do it all over again.

Time Goes on and on

Well if it isn't the girl who came back from the dead. See, first I found Dean Winchester which was awesome, and then I totally went berserk on him and told him to stop him crazy brother who is just creepy and drinking demon blood and all that (Yes that is right, you Supernatural lovers will totally know what I am talking about). Then I came back out of there and realized that I had this creepy creepy freak following me online. Stalker freakyness. Not much I can do about that but block them. Then I got sick and almost went back down there. What am I doing in hell in the first place, I should totally be in heaven. Then I called awesomely awesome, but equally crazy big brother who is 2 years younger than me, yes I mean Stan, not Jake. Then we talked about Grimmjow and Ichigo, and yes, they will happen. The point is, I have no inspiration to write. My life is boring, unless you want to hear all about church meeting, and calculus. Oh I mean Vectors. Or Wectors according to some people I know... yes is funny. But alas, it is the end of March Break, I have a sore throat and nothing else to do. Actually I have a ton of chemistry homework but don't tell my awesome chem teacher that. Damn he's awesome. I need to do laundry, clean my room and open my windows. I hate this stupid crazy weatherness. Then I will do homework, then excerise and try to get in shape for prom. Yes I will. Somehow. Heaven help me I will!!!

So yea, that felt good. I will go and do all that now, and then when I feel like writing actual writing I will be back. I promise you. Alright. Maybe I'll take a shower first.