Lots of randomness

I found a list of quotes that I find quite amusing- so here they are:

Stop wondering if the world is ending today, its already tomorrow in Australia.

Man was predestined to have free will.

Maybe the world is another planet's hell.

The only thing that stops God from sending another flood is that the first one was useless.

Love your enemies. It makes them so damn mad.

Just remember, if they world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years.

Don't feel bad. Alot of people have no talent.

That's a lot of laughs is all I can say, so I can go and help with cooking:)
Just a random note, I am in London, and maybe photos shall follow!!!

-MC

And That’s 10 years off my life.

The amount of people who smoke in Switzerland freaks me out. It’s disturbing that a country so advanced in everything else is this idiotic over something proving to cause cancer (not to mention other issues… but you all know about me and cancer). I mean dude man my teacher smokes, my dads friends at the hospital smoke. At first, it went beyond my brain that people (who I presume have a fully working brain) smoke knowing that its harmful. Now it’s become: well if they want to commit slow suicide, I won’t complain, but if I get Second-hand Smoke Disease- I will sue. I don’t who or what. But I will sue.

Anyways.

Here’s something I saw in a Magazine once and it was hilarious and (obviously from Stupid.ca) but I got an idea so here it goes:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

I could die from …

playing chicken with another car behind me without a car of my own

because of an iPod electrical short out.

choking to death on a piece of popcorn because you were laughing so hard during a screening of "Dude, Where’s My Car?"

bit by a vampire

driving off a cliff because I was skyping with my GPS.

tripping over a shoelace into a tram line while wearing Velcro shoes.

falling asleep in my car while it was running

seconds before starting to rule the world

anything involving knives, anger and a rousing game of "Uno"

breaking my neck during Twister.

trying to do an impression of Curly during a "softball-sized" hailstorm

wearing a long necktie over an operating blender

skinny dipping down the Niagara Falls

licking the chemists spoon!

by getting stabbed with a cucumber

choking on Play Doh

falling up a mountain

landing a plane that was crashing, but dying right after

by texting while driving

from Toxic Shock Syndrome

or being hit by dark matter

But I will not die from smoking.

 

Dreaming Out Loud

Location: Mathew Uncle's house
Music: Dreamin' - OneRepublic - Dreaming Out Loud
Mood: Please refer to Music

Haven´t had a chance to do a proper update for the longest time ever. This is not going to be too long but I can't not write about this song when it's become the song of the month. OneRepublic has, since Trisha recommended them- become a one hit favourite with Apologize. I've had the entire album 'Dreaming Out Loud' for the longest time but I never listened to it so lately (especially since the whole iPod went berzerk on me, and I have a huge list from Chris P (not you Canada Chris) to go through) I needed -relatively- new music so I remember OneRepublic.

Dreaming Out Loud is a soft CD. I see a relativity to Coldplay's melody like Fix You and The Scientist, but also Augie March when it comes to the lyrics. Especially Dreaming Out Loud. Well read this:

hello sir, we live for Mondays,
Confident we'll get there someday,
Pushing all the papers to a wealthy man,
Might I say, a beautiful tie you wear,
And how do you find such lovely polka dots and stripes these days?

I think of Augie March. It has a randomness and totally abstract point of view that listeners need to listen to it a couple times before it makes sense. Right. It's the apple for the teacher, the sucking up to your boss. But its written in a way that I think what? Basically, its a musically simple melody backed up by really really strong lyrics.

At the same time Say (All I Need) is something Coldplay like. Its simple BUT beautiful. OneRepublic totally has me wrapped around their CD.

Made Me Glad

Location: Home, which at the moment is Spital Sanitas in Kilchberg, Zurich, Switzerland.

Mood: Hungry, waiting for dinner to cook already!

Music: Blessed- Hillsong- Made Me Glad.

 

Been listening to the BLESSED CD by Hillsong. Well when your iPod decides to go Carrie on you and kills all your songs, you start listening to your old CD’s… and this song is just plain and simply put- awesome to the point of tears and other… happenings. So maybe not so plain and simply put. Anyways, here are the lyrics, find it online and listen. And sing it. You’ll learn something.

I will bless the Lord forever
I will trust Him at all times
He has delivered me from all fear
He has set my feet upon a rock

I will not be moved
And I'll say of the Lord

You are my shield, my strength
My portion, deliverer
My shelter, strong tower
My very present help in time of need

Whom have I in heaven but You
There's none I desire beside You
You have made me glad

And I'll say of the Lord
You are my shield, my strength
My portion, deliverer
My shelter, strong tower
My very present help in time of need

As a totally random side note: I have totally been shaken by Monica’s words the other day. She said, “God is God. It is we who should be on our knees.”

Christliche Zentrum Buchegg

I love my new church. This isn’t to say I hate my old church. I just happen to love my new church.

We had an interesting message today about Stress. What I love is that I don’t get bored out of my mind here- things are simple but easily understood. It makes sense to me. Susanne basically told us to relax, and that we needed stress but not too much of it. For example, take an acoustic guitar. When its just by itself, and the strings aren’t stretched or pulled, then there is nothing to worry about, its a pretty guitar, but it isn’t being used. It’s useless. On the other hard, you pull the strings hard enough, they’ll break on you!! Anyways, if you click here , you can listen to the sermon! Go Monika and her translation! Makes life easy for me:D

God One and Only

Location: Annie Auntie's house, watching Bones!
Mood: Hungry for the pizza I just made!
Music: Faith+Hope+Love- Hillsong Live- God One and Only

Yes, I told you so. I've become obsessed. The last three posts have been all about Hillsong Live's new CD. It's awesome though, but I must admit; I am surprised at the fact that this hasn't become my absolute favourite- the best will remain and has for a while: "All Of The Above" and of course, OF COURSE, "A_Cross//the_EARTH" simply because "You hold me now" and "Tear down the walls" are just too good. However, "Solution" has and will remain the song that I relate most to and can understand best; so it's "All of The Above".

Anyways.

To the point. This CD is amazing. I am a bit surprised at the lack of "Take It All"-like songs but that was because I've been listening to songs like "It's Your Love" and "I Will Exalt You". However, my opinion was changed when I heard "God One and Only" I was just sitting at home listening to it and by the end of it, I like jumped up and down and "YEA!" The hook for me was the chorus, the lyrics are something that a child would think up; and again, like "I will Exalt You", it was catching to my heart. Anyways, here are the lyrics (Chorus is bold)

In a world that’s lost and seeking
You’re the answer to every need I know
It’s You alone

I find a hope for all my life
I’m living as a sacrifice for You
In freedom and in truth

Always I know You are here and You live in me
In my life You’re the only one I need.
Jesus I believe

You’re the one who saved my soul
You gave me life so I give it back to You
My God God one and only!!!

Now I stand in Your salvation
I keep the faith and I fix my life on You
My hope is found in You.

You chose the cross and You took my place
And I believe it
This is love that I can’t explain
Yes I believe it

God one and only God one and only God one and only!!!

Truly amazing when I think about. Youtube it! It reminds me of "More than Anything"...

So now it is time to eat my pizza... so I will talk to you later... and I really need to write my story ASAP! I promise to update till then Tchüss!

I Will Exalt You

Location: Still in Kilchberg, right at home
Mood: Happy and peaceful
Music: Faith+Hope+Love- Hillsong Live- I Will Exalt You

And like I promised, another review for Hillsong Live's Faith+Hope+Love... for Brooke Fraser-Ligertwood's "I Will Exalt You". Here are the lyrics:

I will exalt You
I will exalt You
I will exalt You
You are my God

My hiding place
My safe refuge
My treasure, Lord, You are
My friend and King
Anointed One
Most holy

Because You're with me
Because You're with me
Because You're with me
I will not fear

It is a very simple song. But the point is simple. It's like "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want" Because the Lord is with me, he is my hiding place and I have nothing to worry about. It's so simple and it reminds of something a child would sing.

The repetition is what I love. I will exalt you, I will, I will- because YOU ARE MY GOD! Because you're with me, I WILL NOT FEAR!

It begun again!

Location: Spital Sanitas, Kilcherg, Zuerich

Mood: Tired from walking around the city all day!

Music: Faith+Hope+Love - Hillsong Music Australia – It’s Your Love

That’s right. It’s official. More important than freaking anything is this beautiful thing called Hillsong. It’s actually a beautiful combination of faith, hope and love mixed with the right proportion to form: the newest Hillsong cd! That’s right! Powerfully named: “Faith+Hope+Love”!

As usual, when a new Hillsong CD is released; I begin to listen to nothing else. The first time I listened to the whole thing- I supposed what I really realized was that it wasn’t as ‘bright’ or ‘explosive’ as A_Cross//the_EARTH which kind of makes sense because United tends to make worship that you dance and go crazy with (though not always- look at Inside Out). I’m not saying that this CD is calmer, it has a different fire and passion, it’s the music you close your eyes and you’re not on earth anymore, you’re in The Heavenly Father’s Throne Room and you are singing with the angels.

A song that instantly stood out is what I am listening to right now. What touched me and opened my eyes really while I was waiting for a tram in the Hauptbahnhof (Central Railway Station). It goes like this:

It’s Your Love, it’s Your Love, it’s Your Love that has saved me

It’s Your Blood, it’s Your Blood, it’s Your Blood that has made me

And it’s like Hosanna; cause “The People Sing, The People Sing!” And they did and it was like a revelation to them, or it was their testament- and it was their belief and cry out to God. It was pretty scary actually.

It’s Darlene singing it and she sings it like there’s nothing else she ever wants to sing and when I heard it, I’m standing there going, “God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son that whosoever believes in Him, shall not perish but have eternal life!” And then Darlene says: “How Great, How Great You Are! It’s Your Love! Church think about this tonight, come on this is the Cross! This is What Jesus did for us! God so loved the world that He gave his only son! The whosoever that believe in him would not perish but have everlasting life! How Great Are You God!”

And I’m like what! Amazing. It made me think of How Great Our God really is and how amazing his works are. And how lucky we are in this entire HUMUNGOUS Universe to have the blessed opportunity to know this person who is bigger than all 156 billion light years of our Universe.

And this person who rules this universe with glory, majesty and absolute beauty and grace; he gave us his blood, and focused his love on us- on this tiny planet in some God-known corner of the universe. 

That is love.

See we don’t understand love because we say I love you to our friends and our dog and husband and mother and sister and what not. Because it’s the same thing no matter what. Three little words that mean a whole bunch of different things. Think about it this way, Japanese couples spend their entire lives together and they’ll say I love you in a hundred different , most of them never say “I love you” as in Aishiteru. Aishiteru is love that is unconditional, self-less. That’s the love that God gave me and you and I will never love anyone like that because I, as a simple human being, do no posses the ability to love like that.

Ultimately, God gave us the love that we can’t produce in ourselves, and I, Merin Chacko cannot understand it.

A Note to The People Who Brought Me Up

Dear Jean, Jerin, Jaison, Vini, Julie, Sajan, Jason, Leena, Reena, Jiji, Susan, Saira, Fiby and Ribi,

Wow. That was a long list…

Hey guys! I have to say that its finally sinking in: the point where I realize I don’t have your shoulders to depend on and I don’t have your company to keep me smiling. A youth group is very important in the lives of a Christian youth; it’s the family that some people don’t have and I think that the fact that our youth is so small- it’s not so bad. I know most of us are separated now and its not the same anymore- but for me- you guys meant a whole lot. I always felt like I didn’t fit in with the world of today- and I want to change it; and some of you don’t understand it and can’t wrap their minds around it- but you all still support me, so Thank You.

Jean, I love you- me and you had a really close relationship even though most of the time; we just throwing insults at each other; or ganging up on someone else:P You’re a lot of fun- but the right kind of fun, and a great example. I’m missing you a lot right now. You care a lot- and I only realize it at sometimes, like when I see you crying, it was hard. I remember when you went to get married I was thinking, “What am I going to do? When was the last time I didn’t see Jean at church or at the mall or what not?” Now I’m doing the same thing to you, but it’s going to be a longer time. Whatever, you come visit; and I’ll think about taking you places in Europe. Maybe I’ll even let you sleep on a bed instead of the floor:P

Jaison, I’ve been missing you for a while now- and it’s finally hit me harder than ever before. When I was in Canada I was like, “I wonder when I’ll see him,” but because your whole family was there and I was like whatever. Now, even if you visit, you still won’t see me. I’m really proud of knowing you- you’re like the big brother that I want but obviously didn’t get. You’re thousands of kilometres away from me, and you still advise me and I still remember our conversation on Google talk. Thanks for just being there, even when you’re not. You know I love you.

Jerin, I will be honest- sometimes you drive me insane. But I love you for that. And we have fought before- but working together with Youth and whatnot, you gotta admit- it was fun! You’re this guy that I look at and you’re not the adult, but you’re not the kid either. Just plain awesomeness. (Even if you sing higher than me and Jean can handle!:P)

Vinita, for some ‘God-only-know’ reason; we clicked fast. From practically the moment you came, we got along so well; and I’ve always been able to share everything with you; and I’ve put a lot of trust in you. And you deserve it. I know if I need to talk, I can call you anytime; and you were fine with it. And you came to see me minutes before I left- I was so touched by that. You, Allison and Diana were like keeping me from crying the last few moments. Thank you.

Julie, you’ll always be ammachi!:P We’ve had great times, and you’ve watched me grow from a rather annoying brat to someone who is still a brat- but hopefully less annoying. You’ve been my teacher and have taught me a lot. You won’t be soon forgotten.

Sajan, aka Sajchachachacha: You and your brother were the first people I met in Canada (other than Jose uncle, but they’re family so they don’t count!:P). I can relate to you, but then again you’re so different from me. Where you get us all together for skating, I drag us all to the Hillsong Concert (WOOHOO!). But while I’m obsessed with the environment, you just don’t get it. If I had the time, I think we would’ve had a very interesting conversation about all that. I love that you’re not ashamed to speak Malayalam in front of uncles and aunties even if some of the words are wrong (Which is totally fine, cause you give us all a good laugh). I think it’s awesome that you speak it even though you grew up here. You’re able to laugh at yourself and a lot of mallu’s are too embarrassed to do so. Stay funny:P

Jason, I have two words, but its technically a name: Inu Yasha. Omigosh. Let’s start there, and we’ll move along. I thought it was awesome that you watched IY. We always end up watching the same thing even when we know about it- for example, Bleach! Not a lot of mallus out there into manga. Lots of funnyness followed all that. Moving on, my most memorable moment from you was when we were talking and I remember this clearly cause you said, “It’s what you think is right or wrong, and I can’t judge you for it, if you think its right” And I remember when I told other people about the piercing, they were like oh- you’re gonna get kicked out of church, or like “what’s wrong with you? That’s not right”. You didn’t judge; you were above that, and I’ll never forget that you were okay with me doing what I believed was right.

Leena, Oh Monie! Great 9 was crazyness and we made it through. We were best friends that year, through crushes and school and crazyness and Benji and Craig passing and all the crap at home, you were there. All the embarrassments, like me falling flat on my face walking home or you burning your eye trying to straighten your hair! I’m laughing as I think about it. And all our songs. Never forget “Ashira L’Adonai!” And “Lead me To The Cross”. I love you so much, and I miss you and I hate that I didn’t get to see you before I left.

Reena (CHECHI)! Omigosh if Jaison my big brother, you’re my big sister. You’re the girl who was like the adviser when I was angry at stuff at home, and you’d talk to me while the three of us sat in Monie’s room. And you took me to the hospital for the co-op interview and I remember us sitting there praying about it and I was feeling so much better after that!

Jiji, or should I say Acha! I still have the picture you drew from me at the picnic, and the “Sister” cup you gave for me. You weren’t afraid of admonishing me when I was being stupid- and I felt so at home when I used to come over all the time. I felt like you really cared and it was good. You’re a great father and a wonderful person.

Susan, I was so touched that you spent so much time on that photo, its beautiful and I love it. It’s such a wonderful memory of all of you. We’ve had fun times and awful times during anniversary and I will never forget “Re-introduction of Christ” I can still remember parts of it, “Like Jesus is my homeboy, or Jesus got me employed or Jesus is my Decoy!” Ahh Good times. And “Mercy came running” Run Susan! And we’ve had, what no one will EVER FORGET- “Rachel Goes To School”. Take care, enjoy University and I know you’ll be fine. Take care of your health, I do worry for you. (L)

Saira, another one of my big sisters. “I didn’t really know you well, but you’re like a daughter to me!” AHAHA. I’m sorry, I had to say that- that was so funny. I’m glad to be one of the people in our church who don’t have to say “I didn’t really know her, but she was like a daughter”. We’ve had great experiences and conversations that I’ll never forget. You’re gonna be a doctor and I know you’ll be successful. So take care of those patients while I do the lab work!

Fiby and Ribi, you’re like my family…. WAIT A SECOND. Right, you are my family. I’m so glad that we were able to form this great relationship, and with Ethan as well. You care so much for me and advise me on so many things, it won’t go to waste. I promise you that. I love you, take care and please keep in touch.

-----

You’re all this huge pillar that lifts me up and puts me where I am. I’ve heard this from lots of people and it’s that I’m not like a normal mallu, or even a normal teenager- and usually, they meant it not in a good way. And if I tell them I want to change the world- they laugh.

You guys don’t, you tell me I can do it, and that I’m able to. You give me strength and when I do reach this techno-crazed generation of ours to open their eyes and see the world for what it is, that people are dying, and the earth is dying, and we need to be God’s hands and feet and do something about. When I do whatever it is that God has planned for my life, and my hands and feet- I know it wasn’t just me. It was God, and it was all of you.

All of you know my mom passed away, and it’s not like I have a strong enough mother figure in my life, and you’ve all been there for me like that family that I wanted. We’re like strands of a tightly knit fabric. And we’re being stretched and pulled all over the place- and it hurts like something bad because we’re so tight and we’re not supposed to stretch so far. But we have, and the strands didn’t break. They stay, however much they’re stretched, we’re still part of this family and they’re not going to break. God knit us together and without his permission, we won’t break- and I know that for sure.

I know I’ve caused some of you a lot of grief with my whole “If I don’t believe it’s right, I won’t lie about it and make people happy". I hope I’ve inspired you even a fraction of how much you’ve all inspired and blessed me. It was a great experience and we’re not losing each other any time soon, that’s for sure.

So till we meet, God bless, and don’t forget me. Or what I believe. Remember that this world is not something God has given us to exploit. It is our responsibility to take care of it, and the ones who live on it. Are we really that cold that we close our eyes and change the channel when we see the children in Darfur or Rwanda? Are we going to say its okay and judge all those kids in Canada who are drunk, high or who knows what? God has given us talents, and it’s time we used them to make a change. That’s my belief, and I hope that you guys feel that same- and do something, even if it’s just taking your not so fortunate friend to a concert so he can know about Christ, or going to Rwanda under the Red Cross- it’s all in His name, and you will be rewarded.

God Bless.

Yours truly,

Merin

Technorati Tags: Jean Varghese,Jaison,Vinita,Jerin,Leena,Reena,Jiji,Susan,Saira,Fiby,Ribi,Jason,Sajan,Julie

CABLECOM!!

Location: Spital Sanitas, Kilchberg, Zurich, Schweiz.

Mood: Stomach hurts! So basically in pain- but at the same time I’m laughing at my situation.

Music: Dreaming Out Loud- OneRepublic- All We Are

Alrighty, so my internet finally got fixed yay! Or at least my phone did, I’m waiting for my dad to come home so he can hook up the modem to router and w/not. Ahhh it was an interesting experience cause this guy came from Cablecom to fix it right and my German is just plain awful! So I’m just like trying to explain in German and I give up and he’s trying and its not working- so we ended up trying in English and that was another failure. Finally we called this guy to translate basically… yea. That was funny. Real funny. Omgosh he was like “Okay, bye bye!” We were laughing so much… and my dad’s gonna be back soon so I shall go now. Go Cablecom!

And my nails are this ‘pretty pink coral’ shade and I’m not sure I like it. Reminds of a brown girly girl and I’m not really that. I was a better shade of Green- that would be nice. My black pisses my dad off and I’m getting bored with it anyways. And I don’t like the red anymore… I really should be studying. YAY! I have internet! I don’t think I’ve ever been so excited about internet!! I shall be able to talk to all my crazy friends and stalkers (I joke… I wonder if I have any stalkers- I know of one so far…)

YAY! I want to call Jean but I think if I call right now, I’ll probably wake her up since its like 5:45 in the morning. That would be an interesting conversation. “Hey Jean!” “Why’d you wake me up” “I’m sorry, I missed you and I wanted to call you all the way from Switzerland!” “Well call me later” “Fine” “Bye”

That would be funny. Or not. I’m on chapter 5 of my story Imbroglio and what really annoys me is that a lot of people read it and favourite and what not- but they don’t review! It doesn’t make me angry but its like you could’ve reviewed once and let me know what you think! But at the same time; if they have nothing to say but “Please Update!” I’d rather not get a review- I like the comments and interestingness of it all. My story reminds me of my friend Laura (she’s kind of psycho, but I love her for it!!)…

Alrightie, my stomach is hurting and I don’t really know why. So I’m going to go and study now. Maybe drink some water.

AND A TOTALLY RANDOM NOTE:  Thanks to Allison who at the most unpredicatable times; show up with a review! YEA!:D

Solution

It is simply human compassion that requires us to go and fight for the dreams of the broken nations around the world. We have no right to just stare while we fatten ourselves (note that I am including myself) while they starve to death, or are forced to send their young children (as young as 3) to become child soldiers. It is not fair to simply switch the channel in TV so you don’t have to look at the face of yet another sick or starving person- or at the child who’s hands were cut off because they refused to fight. Far above all, it is not above each and every one of us ignore the cries of people who are less fortunate and act like we’re above them. Because we’re not. We’re all made from the same thing- and each of us are special to God. Some of us were meant to make a lot of money and what not; while others are supposed to work for $1000/month in the most dangerous places in the world. Others are meant to be helped so they succeed and then continue on to help others. We don’t know- so we have no right to judge their lives and let them keep on dying.

I find it just like when we let plants in the Amazon jungle die; knowing that we might have just killed off the very plant that say; cures cancer. We might’ve just lost a 2 month old baby in Afghanistan that was supposed to become the answer to all their problems- the next president. Who the hell knows?

It’s kind of sad when you think about it- but I guess we as humans don’t want to see it happening around the world- so we ignore it and let it continue on- just not in front of us. I suppose this is why Joel Houston sang, “Let God be the solution, and we’ll be your hands and feet”

The way I take this is: I can’t really do much alone; so I’m going to ask God to help. On the other hand, we can’t sit around and expect God to do miracles without doing our parts so that’s what motivates me to do something. I’ll be his hands and feet, and he can take me where he wants to right?

So I’ve gone on and on about being an oncologist, environmental activist or what not. I’ve never actually asked him if that was what he had in plan for me. One  thing I learned this week was that whether I follow him in the beginning or not; I’ll always end up taking the route he wants in the end- so I don’t really want to waste 5+ years doing medicine only to realize hey; that’s so not what I’m supposed to be doing. So I’m going to start praying every day and asking him what he wants me to do; and we’ll see- I got a year to go right?

Amazed

So I decided that having a bunch of shows to watch over this year was just bad and I needed to cut them down. Now I just made a chart of the shows and what to cut, and here it is:

 

Yes	Doubtful	No
House	The Listener	Fringe
Bones	Queen Seon Duk	Dollhouse
Supernatural	One Tree Hill	F4
Bleach	Coffee Prince	Castle
Numb3rs		True Blood

 

14. I watched fourteen shows last year. Granted, Bleach was half an hour, The Listener, True Blood, Dollhouse, Fringe and Castle I watched over the summer, and Coffee Prince and Queen Seon Duk are one season shows. I’ve managed to limit down to 5 + the doubtful which I’ll watch over the summer. Man, I’m hoping that I don’t pick up anymore German shows, or any Asian Dramas. And thank GOD that I’m done catching up on Bleach, One Piece and Naruto or I’ll still be watching. I do believe if I keep to this schedule, I’ll free up some time for work.:D

In Switzerland!

Location:On the big orange couch, waiting for my dad to get out of the shower.

Mood: So so so jetlagged… is that is mood?

Music: Twilight Soundtrack- Paramore- Decode

I’m actually writing this without an internet connection, so no idea when this is actually getting published. YAY! OKAY, so as of the moment, it is 9:45pm, in Kilchberg, Zurich, Switzerland and I just finished unpacking! At the moment, me and my dad is in this studio apartment which is just so plain adorable… we’ll see how that works out. We went to visit Anthony Uncle and Lily Auntie today, man it was great… but I was so tired. I have no wireless its killing me!! I have chapters to update and people to call… like ALLISON! I will call asap… same goes for Stacey but that’s an expected one.

The flight was cool. I couldn’t sleep because one of my eyes been sore for a while (long story) so opening or closing just hurt… its kind of funny, until you realize it hurts. Anyways, it wasn’t so bad in Brussels; except it was unbelievably confusing. But like every other store was a chocolate shop…good thing I had no money. I watched The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past on the way here- funny movie. The cool thing was that they did customs and stuff in Brussels right? So apparently, due to the Schenken treaty, flying from Belgium to Switzerland is not international- its domestic! So I basically flew in, picked up my luggage and walked off! Very cool.

Alrighty, I’m going to eat dinner and then get some sleep. I’m going to Uni tomorrow to get applications and stuff for German classes, wish me luck!

2 days Left

Location: Canada for the moment

Mood: Blank

Music: Saviour King- Hillsong- In Your Freedom

So it’s come to that point where the bags are packed, and all the colourful stuff is off the walls. I see paint stripped walls and empty closets. I see good bye gifts and passports, and lots of other stuff.

It’s kind of weird, I’ve been rather lazy of late- I haven’t really had anything to do- but I’m in for a hard ride from the moment I land in Switzerland; from learning the languages to finish my education; and doing this alone, it kind of hits me- I’m starting to grow up. And I don’t really want to. You know when you’re a kid and you’re always frustrated because you can’t do the things big people can do? Then you grow up and you’re like, better be a frustrated kid than a failed adult.

Once I go, there’s a huge range of people I can become- from the person who finishes her degree, gets a high paying job; to someone who decides to screw it and follow God, or someone who has no money because she spends it all trying to defend the environment, because someone needs to. Or I could become the person who marries to early and sits at home with her kids; her life wasted and all the chances she could have- gone. Or I could get into a plane accident and die before I could do anything. Or I could get sick again. There’s a billion things that can go wrong.

I’ve been left alone before and personally, I think I can handle it pretty well. It’s not like it hasn’t happened before. And it’s not like I’ve actually been taken care of by someone the last 10 years all that much. I suppose being alone gives me the chance to get closer to God. Being alone also gives me the opportunity to get into quite a lot of trouble; so I’m hoping that I get that intuition or guidance to tell me what is right and wrong, if you get what I mean.

Anyways, two days- I can’t say I’ll miss you all- I’ll miss some of you, others it’s more like thank God and others I just don’t care. I guess its been a unique experience- Canada that is, let’s see how Switzerland goes!

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

Just as a side note, there is a chance that in the coming months or so, I might just start a brand new blog in German, but I’ll probably update this more often. Anyways.

Fanfiction

Hey People,

Like I said before, I wrote my first FF at FF.net, and the first chapter is out. Now don't go and read it if your not a Bleach fanatic, and haven't read the latest chapter... because spoilers ensue. Here it is: www.fanfiction.net/~ataleoncetold

If you scroll down, you'll notice something that says "Imbroglio" Enjoy!

In Memory Of…

For most of you, as a child, you expect your parents and your grandparents to live forever. You don’t question it, because you’ve known them since the day you were born, and you don’t know a life without them, because well that had never actually happened. For me, I know better than this beautifully painted ignorance. People die. My mom did, and that was just over 13 years ago. But just because I know better doesn’t mean I don’t have that naive belief anyways. Though I know it probably won’t happen, I expect my dad to be around to see my kids. And I expect my dear, dear grandparents, both Appachan and Ammachi in Katode and in Edamun; to live, for the lack of a better word, forever.

Well that’s one belief crushed.

18th of July, 2009; my maternal grandfather Mathew passed away.

I last saw him 3 years ago. And I remember that he would complain about us watching T.V. and say that it was the devil in a box. I remember when I was probably in grade 2 and I went to visit him, and there were all these Rubber Trees and he was making the sheets of rubber to sell them. And there is this huge photo of my mom there, and every time I go there, my grandmother bursts into tears and my grandfather says that we should’ve grown up in Edamun. And every time I go, Sam uncle says I look just like his big sister, my mom. No parent should live to see their children die. It just isn’t natural. That leaves us the pain of watching the parent, grow old and die, all this time; never forgetting the precious child that they lost.

I don’t remember my mom at all. As much as it pains me to say this, 5 years ago, when I looked at photos of my mom, I asked my dad, “Is this mummy?” and he said no. That was my aunt Lizzy. I couldn’t even recognize my own mother. Well, I can now, but the point is I don’t have a connection to her, and thus, I don’t have as much a connection to her parents as I do with my dad’s because I grew up with them. Stacey, if you’re reading this, I’ve talked to you about this- I have less connection to my maternal family because… well here’s why I end up keeping in touch with my paternal side. Moncy uncle always calls, and we always call him, because he’s so close- and we' always end up seeing each other. He’s the ‘funny uncle’ and everyone gets along with him. We were never close to Shiny Auntie, or at least I wasn’t and Rennie Papa is like another dad because I used to see them a lot in India, and Pheebe is one of my best friends. On the other hand, Jessie mummy and Lizzie mummy lived in England and I never saw them. I talked to Ronnie once, but after he passed away, I think our connection Jessie mummy was even less. I saw Jose uncle enough, and Johnny kutty uncle as well; but I think with Johnny kutty uncle, it’s a bigger connection to Stace and Stan, and our endless phone calls. I talk to Sam uncle like once and year and so yea, that was basically it. I mean, it’s probably awkward enough for them to call me since mummy wasn’t alive and Daddy wasn’t usually in Canada, but I never had the initiative to call either; which was a big mistake on my part.

Wow I ramble a lot, the point I’m trying to make with all this is that I’m going through a guilty phase at the moment. My grandpa lost my mom, and then all he had of her was me and Josh. Josh is just a little kid, but I should’ve kept in touch and told him, ‘hey, I know you exist, I care'. I do care, I remember him, don’t get me wrong! I know him and I remember him well; but I don’t remember him the way I remember my grandparents from my dad’s side. I remember little snippets, not the last time we went shopping together and whatnot. It’s just, now that I think- what if he spend his last two years (in bed rest), not having anything to do, and thought of his life, and my mom, and her kids. Did he wonder if we were okay? Why weren’t we calling him? Why weren’t we there? Didn’t we love him? I was too young to remember what they were like when mummy passed, but I saw, and still see the amount of pain and suffering that Jessie mummy goes through because of loosing Ronnie, and Ronnie was 15. And grandfather went through this for 13 years. And he had a connection, which was us- but we were too lazy and stupid to care and remember that our grandfather, the oldest of all of them, even older than my great grandma, was sick, and he loved us, and worried, and had suffered greatly. If there was anything I could do, I would. But I can’t. Because its too late and he’s gone now.

What I’ve really learned from all this is that I still have 3 grandparents left- and I shouldn’t really be taking them or granted, because you never know. Everybody has this invisible timer on top of them, and its inevitably going to reach 0, so I’m not going to think I have all the time in the world to keep in touch, because I clearly don’t.

Life and Death are in the hands of God, but the things you do in Life, well that would be your own choice. So it’s my choice to grieve my grandparents or not, and I refuse to keep doing it.

Bleach Characters

So I usually don’t take a lot of online quizzes and stuff but when I saw this, I had to do it. I was totally ready to get like Unohana-taichou or Soifon or something because we have a lot in common. But I’m Rukia! That’s just hilarious! But I have a cool sword, so whatever!:P

Click here if you want to take it!

 

Then I saw this and took it… just cause it looked like fun. I know I have the biggest non-human obsession with Ukitake, but he literally is what I want you know- older, “he’s prettier than me…” look with lots of wisdom and character. And I love that I get to take care of him when he’s sick. Anyways, knowing that I’m a fool for Ukitake. I tried to take it as unbiased as possible… and ended up with…

 

Ukitake Jyuushiro!!!!

You are majorly into May-December relationships -- this man is way too old for you, and his head of white hair and his persistent coughing doesn't help. Still, it's hard not to love him -- he showers you with expensive gifts whenever he feels like it and loves to eat at all the best places. He inspires devotion in you and always knows the right thing to say when you're down. He's a man with an unwavering sense of justice tempered with mercy, a boyfriend who'd forgive every little transgression within reason. Just remember that sometimes you'd have to baby him when he's ill. Take care of him yourself or else his insane assistants will try to usurp your position in his heart.

Click here if you want to take this one!

I Heart Lesson of the Day

Location: Locked up in my room.

Music: Simple Plan- Shut Up

Mood: “I don’t give a chocolate fudge”

So sometimes it takes a long time to realize something very simple. People suck. Some people, like Mahtab, suck in a funny way- we love them. Other people suck in the “Kill me now, I’m going to kill them cold heartedly” way. Then there’s the “Whatever people” and the “Awesome” people. So they don’t really suck. But 1/4 people- they do suck in an awful way. Anyways, instead of killing people, you have two choices, tell them to eff off. Or ignore them. Now imagine if Obama sucked. (I’m not saying he does, I’m in Canada, American politics do not interest me, unless counting sheep has failed in putting me sleep). However, I imagine that telling Obama off is not a smart choice. I mean come on, he’s got, most of a country on his side. Or so I believe… I wouldn’t really know, considering that American politics, bore me. Then again, Canadian politics bore me. Except for the green party. I think they’re cool. Anyways, back to telling Obama to eff off. Not a good idea. Besides, how are you going to get an audience, I can totally imagine this: “Why do you want to see Mr. President?” “I’m gonna tell him off” “Ah. Security”

So yeah, not a good idea. Ignoring Obama is pretty easy. Well actually no, considering that I walk into the school hallways, and I’ll see at least one Obama T-shirt. I think Merin T-shirts would be so much cooler but hey, its a matter of opinion. Just that my opinion is better than yours. Yes I joke, I do not need to get caught up in an online flaming war. That’s not nice. Even if my opinion is the right one. I just think I would photograph better than Obama, that’s all. And my sister’s cute.

Point learned today is something that I would put in my list of “Things I do for ‘I Heart’ ”

I’ve finally learned that ignoring a person works pretty well. It kinda gets them riled up but hey, whatever. If it makes it harder for you to ignore. Blast the iPod. Power metal sounds awesome in your head when you’re trying to ignore someone. So does Simple Plan, everyone knows “I’m just a kid and life is a nightmare". Get an emo haircut. Maybe I should. No I wanna grow it back to long. But it can be emo long…  I think the whole reason I want the emo hair is because the word “emo” is just cool.

Anyways, I’m officially done ranting about I Heart and Obama.

Onto Shane Dawson. I’m not trying to promote this dude or something… yea I get $500 for promoting Shane Dawson. Uh, no. He’s the funniest guy on YouTube. Seriously. I though Fred was funny, he got annoying after a while. Shane’s just hilarious though. Though he named his dog Miley. Why? Well, Miley is a female dog. And so is Miley Cyrus, according to him and the 2000 comments that told him to name his dog Miley. I thought it was cute. Check him out here. 

Well this was fun. Anyways, I’m going to go watch Bleach 228. Here’s the link if you want to read it. I waited to watch it for a really long time last night, but the sub wasn’t out till…what’s 12 hours ago? Midnight. Damn I fell asleep so early. I could’ve watched this last night! Well whatever it’s probably a filler. Oh yea, I see Yoruichi shopping. Anyways, I’ll go and watch that now- here’s the link:

 

And I will talk to you all later! Toodles.

 

Update: Just finished watching it, and of course Bleach needs a Beach Day. My favourite part has to be the Funeral thing they did with Ukitake, poor man. I love him he’s so funny!

Randomness from Sunday to Wednesday

Location: Summer School at HB

Music: United Live- Hillsong United- The Stand

Mood: Sleepy

I just spend my weekend working. Friday: 3-10:30, Saturday all day and Sunday 4-8… I’m so tired that the only thing getting me out of this stupor would be… well Bleach of course! If I have to keep waiting for Friday, I am going to go insane! Going to go sleep now.

Okay my exam is in like 3 hours, let’s pray I do well…

I feel like this is my twitter…

We’re not on your side… we’re on Ichigo’s

Location: Home

Music: iPod is being charged…

Mood: Tired

WHHHATT WAS THATT!!!:D

The Vizards just pulled off the best entry they could’ve EVER done! It’s amazing! I’m shocked, appalled and frustrated at having to wait one more week till the next chapter arrives! Go Tite Kubo! You rock….

I have not much to say about this but that it was great cliffhanger, I love it- I loved it even more when Hirako is asked by old Yama- “Am I right to assume you’re on my side?” And Hirako replies, “Of course not”

I’m thinking WHAT THE HELL, then he goes, We’re not your allies, we’re Aizen’s enemies. We’re on Ichigo’s side.” I was not expecting that!

Well that’s my rant for the day, I have to go read Naruto now- so toodles.

Waiting for teacher to take attendance…

Location: Physics Summer School

Music: Saviour King- Hillsong- In Your Freedom

Mood: Tired as hell

So I just got my American Visa, and lost a day of summer school but whatever its Electricity and all that. I can’t wait for Modern Physics… I need a bigger challenge. This is really starting to bore me to death. I can’t help it- I love the physics but this physics is the stuff that I get in general, so it bores me… it’s going to be like taking advanced functions when I know how to find the derivative.

Anyways… I’m sick of work- I’m thinking of quitting… but then I like having the money:P But then I really really need a break. Anyways I was talking to my buddy from England Mark who is so funny. We ended up discussing what sort of a car I should get… he started talking Cars to me and in the end, he was like “don’t worry about it…” it was funny. And I still don’t know what to get. Between the VW Fox or the Golf but I’ve always been a lover of the BMW M-series… like I’m getting that one. Tough luck.

I was finally getting around to watching Bleach again, and had to sit through a bunch of fillers. I was going to commit suicide but then I remembered that the Chapter was getting released today… and Hirako was back so I put the poison away. I know, I’m morbidly funny.

Anyways, my Hillsong high isn’t really wearing down anytime soon, but I moved from Across The Earth, to Saviour King and like other CD’s… though I’m starting to listen to a lot more of non-Christian, like The Fray, OneRepublic (This started after I watched Castle and heard Stop and Stare), and lots and lots and lots and lots of Kate Voegele. 99 Times vaguely reminds me of something… but I don’t actually know what… someone let me know if you think you know what I’m talking about. Thanks in advance.

Update: It’s 10:45am now and I’ve just spent 10 minutes playing Mahjong Titans, and the other 1/2 hour sleeping.

Wait For Me

This song totally rocks my world and its what I do- I wait for my future husband- and pray for him. Where ever he is.

Bleach 364

Location: Home

Music: One Crowded Hour- Augie March

Mood: Wanting to simply write… very strange.

Beware all Bleach watchers- SPOILERS BELOW!

The last few weeks have been amazing for me, in terms of Bleach simply because of the fact that I live for Ukitake and Kyouraku. Considering that Kyouraku’s bankai is banned, you wonder how strong they actually are. Now I would’ve written about their imminent awesomeness earlier on… but I was too star struck to care. Until he almost cut Ukitake! Poor Jyuushiro-chan actually got hurt. I was on the verge of murderous intent taking over any little sanity my mind held onto and just destroying my pretty pretty laptop (Thank God I didn’t… it’s an HP Touchsmart tx2 that cost me my arm and half a leg (read: 6 months worth of a No Frills Cashier’s Salary). Anyways, then the big shocker hit (no really, I wouldn’t be writing about Bleach unless he actually died, which he obviously didn’t because GOD HELP TITE KUBO IF HE KILLS MY JYUUSHIRO-CHAN! (I may as well be channelling Yachiru).

But then thank The Lord for Hirako Shinji and the other Vaizards who will save the day! I was like wow! They looked awesome. Amazing. Period. But that has to be the first cliff hanger… ever. I was very frustrated by it actually- but all in all, a good chapter.

I-Heart Revolution

Location: Desk at home

Music: Generation- Simple Plan

Mood: Inspired

www.i-heart.org is the new home for the “I Heart” Revolution. I’ve written a huge thing about it, on the left box, but if you want a the spark notes version- its basically a group of people, who help other people and spread the love of God in practical ways. This isn’t us walking around giving out free Bibles. This is us actually taking care of our fellow citizens of Earth and showing love. Anyways, right now- they’re asking us to send photos to them, explaining what it is that we do- and It’s totally awesome, so when someone gets a chance- do this! The I-Heart Revolution is about the people, and this is the future. So me and the rest of us ask you- what’re you going to do about it?

5 Hours of Physics Every Day!

Location: Start of Physics 12 at HB

Music: Annoying cricket sound in the background while teacher takes attendance.

Mood: Sleepy

So between Physics and Chemistry, I always like Chemistry better because it was easier. But to my quirky and odd mind, Physics made sense. Yes, the thing that usually doesn’t make sense to people, made sense to me. I always had to hardest time with my math in Physics, not the concepts of Physics themselves. This makes me realize why I liked Quantum chemistry the best. What? An electron is a particle and a wave? Yea. I get that. What? The world may be made up of tiny vibrating strings that make up everything? Yea. I totally get that. The strangeness of the science meant that I understood everything, but the troublesome math involved. Don’t get me wrong, I love math. I adore it, but that doesn’t mean that it made sense to me. I have a hard time doing things like driving because its so systematic. I takes me time to get the rules or whatever, and I guess because its so logical, I have a hard time with it. I guess you need a logical brain to get math- the purest form of logic (as Mr. K once put it back when I was in grade 11). I don’t have a logical brain. It’s easy for me to follow strange concepts and ideas because hey, illogical just met illogical. I love math, but I love and get Physics.

Yea so I wrote all of this just to say that I love doing 5 hours of Physics in one day.

t00dles.

Cleaning Up Toronto

Location: 5 minutes before bell ringing at HBSS, Physics Summer School

Music: All of The Above- Hillsong- Solution

Mood: Meh

You may know that the City of Toronto’s city workers have striked due to many important reasons; which I agree with completely.  And if you want an explanation, ask Mrs. Bevan- she’s awesome. (Yea, here I go with awesome again). On the other hand, it’s great for city workers- awful for city. Makes us think about how hard they really work. When I stepped into Downtown Toronto, all I saw was garbage, and more garbage.

City of Toronto/City of Garbage.

So Mr. Krstovic, my awesomely (I need a new word to obsess on) awesome (I know) Chemistry teacher and I tried to put together a clean up of Toronto. We’re not trying to offend the workers or anything, just kind of clean up because of how disgusting it was. Anyways, not a lot of people actually want to clean up the city- which makes sense, I mean yea- who wants to spend Canada Day cleaning up TO ? I got my dear twin Sloane to help us plan… but we basically ended up having me, Dale and Mr. Krstovic- and Mrs. Bevan joining us later on, and all we did was simply pick up garbage around the city, by Dundas Square, City Hall and Eaton Centre. In three hours and change (that’s sound oddly right), we managed to collect 11 big black garbage bags FULL OF LITTER!! What really annoyed me was people handing out random things in the middle of the city, and everyone simply throwing it on the ground. They weren’t helpful at all. Well, they have to do their job right?

All in all, it was cool- China Town was just disgusting though, with the garbage everywhere. Nevertheless, I though it was a nice place, considering I’ve never been there before. I had a lot of fun, and I could see the results instantaneously! If 3 people in 3 hours could pick up 11 bags! Imagine 10 groups of 3! That would be like 110 bags!

Now I’m thinking of a bigger clean up… let’s go people! We have work to do!!!

Making a Difference

Location: At My Desk

Music: Sound of Melodies- Leeland- Sound of Melodies

Mood: Worried, really worried.

There’s this line in the song Solution by Hillsong United (big surprise there!) that basically goes like this:

It is not too far a cry
Too much to try and help the least of these
Politics will not decide if we should rise
And be Your hands and feet

Well think about it. This is “I Heart” all over again. And for me, being God’s hands and feet is showing the lost that we’re not isolated freaks or something. It’s showing that what we know to be truth- and the only universal truth, which I personally believe is God. And God is love. So to show the truth, we show our love. Now this can be to the lost sheep in Canada, the hungry and forgotten children of Africa, or even to the special creations of God that humans abuse, from trees to the clay that God made us from; that we step on every day.

Us developed countries, are so blessed, that we’ve come to take it for granted. I think thats unbelievable selfish of us to say that, “people in Africa are too far for me to go and help because I live in Canada”. Or, “Why should I care about the environment? There’s environmentalists to do that”.

To be frank, if we want the whole world to be a better place; that is, all 6.whatever billion people on this planet to all be well fed, healthy and happy, - well that’s going to take more than the few 1000 who care. What I realized this week was that its easy for people to say, “Oh yea, I totally feel bad about the fact that polar bears are dying” Then if you want them to help you do something about it, a million excuses pop up.

For me, I want to make a difference. You know, there’s like 6 billion people on Earth right now, and there’s been a lot more than that if you count all the people who lived and died. Aristotle lived thousands of years ago, but hey? We all know who that is. Einstein, Newton, Galileo, and Darwin. Even Hitler, Martin Luther King Jr., and Caesar all have one thing in common. They made a difference, good or bad- and even now, after they’ve died, our generation knows all of those names. We’re familiar with what they did. They didn’t sit around and say, “It’s too difficult a problem to solve” or “Someone else can do it”. They knew what they wanted to accomplish, so they went ahead and did it.

My generation is full of people who twitter or Facebook rather that talk. It’s easy for people to say no online because they’re not looking at someone in the face and refusing them. We’re born into a culture, a generation that cares less. We don’t feel that responsibility to our community, or that need to do something. Our culture is spiralling towards a dangerous exit, and I’m hoping to God that we get out of this black hole. What I’m afraid of is that our children are going to look back at us and say, “They’re the ones that put us in this situation” whatever that may be.

I’m big about The “I Heart” Revolution because it strives to bring out the activist in people. Whether its to smile more, or stop human trafficking, they believe we can do it. And I think so too. Why not? The only thing stopping us is our selfishness, and need to look out for ourselves before anything else. I see people who’ve taught me or people of an older generation and they grew up caring. I don’t know how we ended up a generation of individual making up an entire group that doesn’t give a damn. And it’s not just they don’t care though. To quote a youth leader than I have much respect in many ways, I was shocked when he looked at me and said, “I don’t get it! Why should I care if the city is dirty or not? It’s not my problem.” I’m not sure how happy I am in a world that can’t understand something so simple as, it’s your home- sustain it, or you’ll lose it; what next planet are we going to jump to in this universe that can sustain life the way earth can? I guess maybe it’s a good thing I was born in thsi generation, because if I were born earlier, I’d just be like the others doing things for the global community. As it turns out, I’m a loner in the midst of a generation which doesn’t care, for the most part. I guess I’m here to play my part, and make them see the change, because my generation needs a nudge. Or more like a giant push towards revolution.

Graduating

Location: On my bed at home

Music: Across The Earth- Hillsong United- This Is Our God

Mood: Reminiscing and Sad, but Happy too

 

June 23rd, 2009. What a night! In few days, I will be a graduate of Fletcher’s Meadow Secondary School. I used to live in Toronto, and before that I lived in Carrolton, TX, and before that, Zurich, Switzerland. This is the longest I’ve stayed in the same area- which is 5 years. So I wasn’t like the kids who grew up here and are graduating with the people they’ve know since they’ve been in diapers.

Nevertheless, I’ve known these guys (and girls)for 4 years (that’s a long time for me:)). I’ve shared Science Olympics, Earth Hour, 30 Hr Famine, Spring Fling, Semi, Fame, Chemistry Show, Mole Day and Ecobuzz. I’ve cried with them through losing people and I was there with them for hours locked up during lock down. I laughed with them when we played truth or dare in the Cafe. I was with them when we stole cookies from Counting on You with Miss Habibzadah. Most of all, I remember days with my best friends of a ll freaking TIME- Leena Kuruvilla(who I need to see desperately or I’ll kill my self) and Michelle Tat (who is the most beautiful girl in the universe!); and singing Take It All and Tell The World in French and Geology! I remember Grade 10 Science with Shilpa and Raina (I swear, I’m going to marry them both!) and how our labs were utter failures- but more fun than all my senior science classes put together (yes people, even more than Chemistry!!!). And I’ve gone from hating Calculus with a PASSION to loving it; and Allison, I love you for staying with me the whole time- you’re an amazing and wonderful friend.

I have to give credit where it is due. There are some people I have to thank  because without them, I would either have blown something up, killed someone (including myself) or been admitted to the hospital for a mental breakdown.

First and foremost, I have to thank God- I don’t know how I survived without having a God who understood me more that anyone. He was always there, even at times I didn’t want him- but he knew I needed him. So Thank You.

My wonderful, quirky, dear sisters in Christ who kept me sane, or as sane as Merin Chacko could possibly be: Leena Kuruvilla, you’re not around anymore- but I know if I need you, you’ll always be there. Michelle Tat, you saved me from going insane- literally, and I can’t thank you and Leena enough for it. Shilpa Varghese, the voice of reason in my head, who always prayed for me and is one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. Reena Kuruvilla, I love you soo much- you are my big sister, and you’re a wonderful role model, Chechi:) And of course, my dear cousins who are my rock and my foundation; Nissy Sunny, and Stacey Mathew- I will love you till the end of the world- just because you rock my world. No one can understand me the way you two do- and no one ever will… these two are my future bridesmaids, and godmothers of my kids!<3

Thanks also to my dear friends who were always there and Fletcher’s would’ve been empty without you. Allison Wong, another voice of reason- but one who helped me realize that I can do what I want to do, not what is expected of me. Thank you. Rabeena Ali, Sagar Patel and Razina Gilao, my first friends at Fletcher's, I’m NEVER going to forget you. Burhan Hussein, one of my best friends, and so funny that it’s annoying- but great. And a genius. You realize things about me before I do… like what the heck!:P Manik Choudhry and Brenda Trinh- my math buddies, we make the best ice cream and you know it! Brenda my date for Prom:P, you’re so amazing- and totally genius. Tej Dhami and Swar Meher , I hope I can have a beautiful relationship like yours- God Bless. Laura Brown, you are outright crazy. I don’t know what the hell goes on inside your head. But I love it! Enjoy your rocks:P Raina Desai, I’m going to call you every week and bug you but I don’t care, I’ve seen you since grade 10- and I’m not gonna let our friendship break. Thank you for just being there. Sloane Martin, my twin- Austria Hungary! All the way! And we both know that we joined and decided to take over the world, it was already done. And your siblings rock, but still manage to drive me insane. Janessa Scantleburry, you’ve got the most beautiful voice, and an even more beautiful heart. Take care of your self. Antoinette Mullings, Thanks for being you and not anyone else, just you. All the damn time. :)Minhaz Khaiser, Xinou Gao and the rest of the Bleach GROUP! Byakuya rules, but I got Ukitake… so we’re good. <3

Keziah Chan and Jennifer Phung (my #1 Green Friend), you’re my little kids- you’ve got another year to go- so be careful and take care! I know you’re both going places. Thanks also to Henry Hong, stay pokish forever!:P Fahd Ali, you’re the nicest and sweetest guy I’ve met, Thanks for driving me back from the hospital when I was too sick, and for handling the news well even when I practically thrust it in your face- I truly am sorry about that. Brandom Zambri aka Russian- you brighten up my day. Ankur Mahajan, Michael Le, and countless others who poke me- I love you all. Manik Choudhry, aka MC- You’re two of kind, and just magically amazing like that. Ankit Sareen, (Father)- you’re just hilarious, and I love you for it. Mahtab Alam, self proclaimed “that sexy guy with sexy pimples”… just wow. You’re on something and I want some!:Patrick Ho-Ly, Filip Zubac, and Chris Ghouchandra(I spelled that wrong I know), you’re all unique and appalling at times. I’m gonna miss you three just for that. Farrah Mohammad, Chemistry 11 was magic thanks to you, and Vincent Santiago- who endured Twilight with me and Sumaira Saif, and ended up listening to my ramblings in 3 semesters of Math. And of course, lets not forget everybody’s scapegoat- the much loved Rutwik Brambhat. You’re not getting you’re test back, but you’re so high and you know it. Thank you all.

My dear Biology 4: we had so much fun!: Dianagris Balakrishnan, you’re such a beautiful person, both inside and out. Remember staying up all hours finishing our History of DNA Timeline? Or Tokio Hotel? OR MY ROOM FULL OF ART? Mohsin Khan, my dear friend with the awesome hair. And Jordan John, my dear “grandfather”, my mallu who’s always there for me, even though I insult him every chance I get, you rock! As for Chemistry 12, you know I won the bet. I’m never going to forget that Ms. Yen thought you two were gay! (Yea I probably shouldn’t have told the world that)

Now the people who’ve been my role models- my teachers from Day 1 to Graduation, I don’t know what I’d do without you. And besides, all the 9’s and 10’s thought I was one of you!

Mrs. Bevan, Mrs. Filliter and Mr. Berwik, my STEP Sponsors- you guys are such dedicated people and I can’t imagine better role models for the future generation of environmentalists. You’ve taught me well:D 

Mrs. M. Thomas, Ms. Mighty and Mrs. Bent-Thomas, thanks for all your support for Christian Fellowship, I’ll miss you. Ms. Lujen, Ms. Yu, Mr. Desjardins, Mr. Devereux (see why I couldn’t say just Mr. D?), Philosophy Club and School Reach was great and fun and I loved it. Thank you for having me, even with my crazy schedule. Mr. Miller, you taught me to get a backbone and stand up for myself. And about falling filing cabinets. Enough said.

On to my third home, second only to the STEP Room and Science Pod, Math Department! Miss Habibzadah, aka Miss Evil. I’m proud to be H-brain-washed. You’re so weird and awesome at the same time, and I keep saying awesome, I’m running out of words to use. And you made Math… well fun, and Hitler has stuck around for the longest time ever- I can’t get rid of the name! Don’t you dare forget Hitler, Baby Beluga and Tardy Flipper, you know you love us. Mrs. Charest, you make me grow up and it was pleasure to learn from you, even if it flew over my head. I guess I am a Physics kid at heart, eh? One day I’m going to look back and remember that I wouldn’t have made these choices without your advices. Mr. and Mrs. Ferneyhough- “We all use math everyday” Fine. You’ve proved it correct and I bow to your awesomeness, happy? I’m gonna miss you two, so take care and keep Nspiring! hehe:) Mrs. Noguchi, I don’t remember my mom, but I were to have an idealized vision of her in my head, its you. I’ve laughed, and cried with you, and we’re so keeping in touch. And the rest of math, you rock, just like math does!

I’m ending with Science because I could probably wax eloquently over the awesomeness of our science pod. Mr. Krstovic- you are an inspiration. I’m awed at how hard you work for us students. You inspire the inner chemist in all of us, not matter how small it is, and you leave an everlasting mark on us all. Besides, its hard to forget a teacher who lit himself on fire!Mrs. Sobec, my quirky teacher- you and your funny analogies that I’ll never forget. You’re one of those people its easy to talk to and just let it out; thank you for just listening to me when I thought I would blow up. Mr. Lippa, you’re the second craziest teacher I’ve met, and you made me love a science that I had a hard time understanding. You’re one of the best I’ve ever had. Mr. Whisen, you show more grace and understanding in teaching than teachers who may have more experience or knowledge than you. And you’re hilarious. Mrs. Regular- I wasn’t sure how you'd be taking over Mr. Lippa’s class- but you were wonderful and all my doubts were wrongly placed- because you taught and you pushed us along till we were the best we could be. Mr. Ellis, I’ve never seen a person with such composure and calm collectedness, even in situations where I know I’d be beating up someone. Mrs. Petrychkovych, you’re a mad scientist at heart and I love your dedication to making Science open and wonderful to the entire student body. Working with you was one of my favourite opportunities this year. Ms. Yen, you’re an awesome teacher and I always left your class laughing at your wit. Amazing. Period. Mr. Killins, you’re probably not going to read this or even remember me- but you’ll always be the teacher that could never stop smiling even when he was mad as hell. And the rest of the science department, I’ve worked with all of you in one way or the other, be in Science Olympics, Chemistry Show or Culture Show, and I have nothing but respect for each and every one of you.

So there it is, my life at Fletcher’s in about 2000 words. I love you all so much, and I can’t believe I’m leaving you all. So many moments that defined my high school career, and now its over and I’m kind of lost. Soon I’m going to leave and I’m going to have to do this all over again, like all of you, except to a bigger extreme.

Before I finish, I have to thank Joel Houston from Hillsong United. He is my biggest role model and he runs I Heart Revolution. He’s changing the world right now, and that’s what I want to do. He’s the person that I want to be, the person who said my signature words, “If our generation is remember for iPods, myspace and YouTube, we failed.” I know we’re bigger than that, we’re going into the real world, and our great teachers and counsellors have prepared us as much as possible.  Now its my turn to show them that we can make a difference. I promise you, I am going to change the world, so you better do it too. I swear to you, I won’t disappoint you, I’m going to make you proud of me, you’ve all supported me so much, that I can’t bear to let you down. Just watch, I’m going to make you proud.

Love always,

Merin Chacko

Nightwish

So any self respecting Finnish Power/Gothic/Orchestral Metal/Rock fans (cause you know, there’s soo many of them out there) would know of Nightwish. They’re loud. They’re long hair. They’re for the most part, ugly. But they’re good. And that’s what ultimately matters. This isn’t America and they don’t have to be hot- this is Finnish Power/Gothic/Orchestral Metal/Rock Then comes the lead singer. For the longest times it’s been Tuomas and Marco. That Tarja. Yea admit, that’s where the “Orchestral” part of Nightwish came in because her voice is like wow-it’s trained. It’s good. And she’s not ugly. Whatsoever. See sometimes, hot=evil conniving b-whoopsies- WITCH. Literally, if you want the whole story look it up, there’s enough people writing about it. So for 2 years, it was Marco and Tuomas again, which personally, its good. Tuomas writes all their songs anyway so its not like they lost something big. The thing is, they’re known for their female rockers. So now that Tarja was gone, they had to get someone new. Here comes Anette. She sounds like evil mixed with a bit of pop. I like it. Lots of people are stuck in Tarja mode. I like them both, and I can’t understand this huge catfight going on with Nightwish fans. ANyways, people go listen to Wishmaster and Amaranth… I gotta say, I like Amaranth better, but anyways, I’m going to sleep now. Actually I;m going to put away my clothes because I can’t actually sleep until I do so. Alrighty- toodles.

Love and (Asymptotes)

The Calculus of Love

Love is one of those things that lots of people try to define, and lots of people fail. There isn’t any point in me trying to define something such as love, because I believe it is like infinity- indeterminate. Imagine a function where each x value represents some sort of word, well when you hit certain words, you either have an asymptote, a hole or the derivative is a vertical line, so it can’t be defined. Things like infinity, life, love and all those cool words. So the point is, I’m not wasting my time trying to differentiate the definition of an asymptote, it Does Not Exist. But I think I’ve found the solution for Love, at least for me. I suppose if I’ve found the definition of love for my function, then everyone must have their own function, which are all the same type- with different stretches and translations to them, but all with certain defining characteristics.

But then again it is entirely possible that love is still an asymptote, its like faith, you can’t put a mathematical value to it, but you know its there (at least I do). Anyways, I found the answer in Joel Houston and his awesome song (the guy should be a mathematician cause he’s such a musical genius; isn’t there some correlation between those two somewhere? And he’s blond. So obviously he’s special:)

Anyways, to the genius’ genius lyrics:

And I don't need to see it to believe it
I don't need to see it to believe it
Cause I can't shake this
Fire deep inside my heart

This life is Yours and hope is rising
As Your glory floods our hearts
Let love tear down these walls
That all creation would
Come back to You
It's all for You

What’s it like to give everything you have to someone and let them rule your life? That’s submission, so people do it out of fear, or love. At least I believe that if there was to be actual submission, you wouldn’t do it out of fear- because then you’d be happy to leave if you wanted to. With love, when you give it away, it wasn’t torn from your hands, slowly wrenched away from each finger, it was simply taken as a gift. The point is maybe humans can’t define love, but obviously God can. So it’s entirely possible that if God had his own function (God can totally do math, He’s awesome like that), he wouldn’t have an asymptote for love, or for anything- cause he can define everything. Then his function would be of higher degree that ours…

Tear Down The Walls

I’ve been listening to the new CD by Hillsong United. And those of you who’ve spend any time with me know what if I was stranded on a deserted island, and I had to choose between my iPod and a pack full of life-saving stuff. I’ve choose the iPod, I’d die before it’s battery die. Well that and the Bible of course, I’d need my Bible. The point is that I love Hillsong. When “This is Our God” came out, I was thinking, “that’s it, they’ve reached their summit, this is the best CD, it was as good as United We Stand… and those two, I listen to all day. Their New CD is with the whole I HEART Revolution, called a_Cross//the_EARTH: Tear Down The Walls. It’s so amazing I’m in class studying and listening to it. Wow. Joel, Dylan, Brooke and Matt went crazy here! I miss Marty now that he’s in the Hillsong Church one- but we’re got Dylan! And he’s awesome. They’re all amazing! Two songs I would recommend looking up ASAP, is “Tear Down The Walls” and “Soon”, they’re brilliant and wonderfully written. “Arms Open Wide” is also great, but “Soon” is my favourite. I got the CD March 26th, when it came out here… and I haven’t listened to anything else yet. I don’t think I will until Faith, Hope and Love by original Hillsong come out. It’s a Hillsong Year for me again:D

A PRODUCT OF WASTED TIME

Masashi Kishimoto, I have the utmost respect for you and your art… but what the heck where you thinking!????? Naruto 449 basically goes like this, “Sorry we destroyed your village, here’s some flowers” No really, that’s what Nagato did. I was like WHAAT?? U LIE TO ME! I cannot believe Naruto just won someone over with words… Ok, I mean that’s great- the fact that he is such an amazing ninja… but life and death are two things that are final. I think that for him to bring everyone back to life was unfair. I mean, Thank you Masashi, Kakashi is back! But at the same time, come on! That’s not how the real world works! And don’t tell me its only manga not the real world… it was like… what??? Naruto 450 on the other hand, was rather interesting. I’m so glad that Naruto is finally receiving the attention that he was fully deserving of. I’m so glad for that. And then Danzo as the new Hokage??? WTF! This is going to screw Konoha over for sure. Naruto just talked to Pain about bringing together the Countries and Danzo is such a black-hearted monster! Another challenge for our great ninja Naruto! Anyways, lets see what happened to Naruto now! It seems Naruto was interesting as usual, now lets just hope Bleach and One Piece get back up there too!!:D

Faith

Now I’ve talked about faith alot. Now' I’ve lost something that I really need and I’m going to be in a lot of trouble without it, because it is worth a lot. But I am saying it here, because I have complete faith in God who can do ANYTHING! that I will come back tomorrow, sit down and write that I have found the precious thing that I have lost. I have complete belief that I will find what I seek. Ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, I will find it tomorrow FOR SURE!!!!!!

What I Learned This Semester

Earth and Space Science is a course which studies the mystery that is the universe, from the 156 billion light years to a relatively minuscule planet called Earth, which is our only home. In the Solar System unit, we learned about how our solar system formed from the leftovers of a nebula. That’s how the only planet known by humans to have carbon based life, was created; through space dust. Then we learned that there were many requirements for life to form on a planet, such as the right distance from the sun, the right size for not only the planet, but the sun as well, the right amount of tilt, and even the right area and type of galaxy. These along with many other requirements are needed for a planet to be able to form life, as we know it. In this huge universe, some scientist managed to calculate that there were 10 000 planets with the possibility of meeting all the requirements to form a planet suitable for life. Assuming that these 10 000 planets do have life, it makes our planet a very rare occurrence in the universe, because we’re one of 10 000, in billions of planets. This made me think about how important it was that we not destroy our only home. Think about it, we can’t keep living on this planet as if we have another one to just go to when we’re done with this one. Life sustainable planets are rare and should be sustained and should not be exploited. But that is exactly what humans are doing; they are using all the materials of the earth, not taking into account how long it takes for those materials to form, or that fact that they are not a renewable source. Humans also ignore the effects that moving earth materials into the atmosphere or water will do. As far as we know, we have only one planet, we do not have the technology to move to Mars and live there, and the earth cannot reproduce certain materials quickly enough because of how fast we consume it. Take for example, the amount of natural gases we use; we do not have an endless supply of it and it take millions of years to return these gases into the ground. Humans also use natural materials such as rocks and minerals extensively. I’ve learned that the rock cycle is a slow process and takes time to happen, so we’re bound to run out soon. All of this knowledge simply goes to show that humans are taking more and more advantage of earth and its materials, so much that earth will not be so hospitable to our future generations. I’m president of the Students Towards Environmental Protection here at FMSS., and what I’ve learned is that Earth has gone through many periods of geological change and continues to do so. Life forms have learned to adapt to changing climate and environment, and the ones who couldn’t were wiped out. The question for us is not how to protect earth and sustain it, mother earth is strong will survive, the question is whether humans will evolve to adapt, or be wiped out. I personally think that it is beneficial for us to simply sustain the planet the way it is right now. Yes, change will occur, but that doesn’t mean that change will have to be so harsh that humans cannot survive. If we don’t do something about the high temperature and even higher sea levels, there will come a time when it’s so hot that humans cannot survive on the planet! There is a fine equilibrium at work on planet earth which has been disrupted rather greatly by the arrival of human beings. Instead of the gradual and inevitable change that earth has proceeded through for billions of years, that rate has accelerated and now it is as if earth is running through change. I’ve decided that I don’t care if other people want to destroy their home. I plan to live long, and I plan to enjoy my life on earth, why should I have to suffer acid rain and soaring temperatures because my parents and grandparents couldn’t control their self-indulgent characteristics? Because they couldn’t walk that drive to the nearby store, or open the windows than blast the air conditioning? Why should my children and I suffer? I don’t care if the elder generation won’t do anything, their time is almost up and we’re the ones rising to write a whole new history, one that will be filled with shift and turmoil. The youth of today will stand up, we will make a difference, it’s our home now, and I refuse to say that I’ve inherited it from you, its more like you’ve stolen it from us, we won’t enjoy the comfort of cooler weather, calmer climate or the lack of the natural disasters that you did, but it’s not too late. I think we can still make a difference, and I think that if everyone sits around waiting for the David Suzuki of our generation to rise up and lead us, nothing will happen, and we’ll be even worse that our ancestors who exploited our only home. So I think if no one else will, then I will. I came into this course with a determination that I would become an oncologist and find the cure for cancer. I could help thousands of people from suffering if I do so. The environment has always been a passion of mine and though I knew I wouldn’t be getting involved in it as a career, I knew it would be there. However, after learning all these things in Earth and Space science, it is clear that I am much more interested in keeping our planet suitable for our needs, because earth will go on orbiting the sun for many millennia, whether we’re still living on it or not. There is no point in finding the cure for cancer if we all die anyways. Now I’m not saying that I’m giving up on medicine here, but I’ll definitely be more involved in Environmental Awareness and Protection, because it is a very important role and it is our duty to do so. In light of my new discovery, I will be taking a double major, if possible in Medicine and Environmental Studies.

Vectors Exams

So my vectors exam is in like 3 hours, and I know I'm not ready. But thats okay because I know a God who knows everything and can do anything. So I'll be fine. I'll be more than fine.:)

Desert Song

So I sang Desert Song, by Brooke Fraser… for some reason, all the songs that I am ABLE to sing, as by Brooke Fraser. It’s interesting to say the least- that me and Brooke have the same basic ranges. But man, she’s a way better singer than me by far. Hillsong United is coming soon! I shall buy tickets, and go!

Anyways, here it is, enjoy, and check out my youtube people!!!! www.youtube.com/user/chackomerin

Bring Hillsong to toronto now!!!!!!

View all Toronto events on Eventful

Apology

So I’ve realized that I’ve  accidentally turned my blog into a place for me to vent out my frustrations. Clearly I’ve not been having a great couple of weeks. It seems my step mother brings out the worst of me- every damn time. Anyways the point is. I’m in Vectors and I’ve realized that I’m not too sure I want to be surrounded by cancer patients all day, or research all day. Mr. K, my awesomely magical Chemistry teacher told me that I should go into project management. I don’t know about that but no matter what I do with the rest of my life- I want to always be involved in environmental awareness and activity so I don’t really know what I’m going to do now. I actually thought I’d never have to go through the cancer thing all over again, but I am- and I LOVE ENVIRONMENTAL SCIENCE. I really love it and I’m so passionate about it- it honestly pisses me off when people disregard our home. But at the same time, there is a TON OF PEOPLE I will be disappointing because I won’t become a doctor. But at the same time, you don’t understand how badly I want to be part of environmental research! I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I’ll write up soon.

i NEVER THOUGHT

I always knew I didn’t fit in. I could go from being the girl who just hung out with everyone in every group, to being the tag along in every group. It never mattered. I knew I didn’t have too long here, I didn’t think I’d survive for this long anyways. Sometimes I think its better not to survive. I’m no suicidal, just thinking about the lack of burdens. Sometimes I feel like I can hear them thinking, “Why is she here? Why can’t she go around with someone else”. I don’t really care anymore. I don’t really know. I know that as soon as I get to Switzerland, I have to do this all over again. Another 10 groups I’m –not- part of. I don’t really want to do it all over again.

Time Goes on and on

Well if it isn't the girl who came back from the dead. See, first I found Dean Winchester which was awesome, and then I totally went berserk on him and told him to stop him crazy brother who is just creepy and drinking demon blood and all that (Yes that is right, you Supernatural lovers will totally know what I am talking about). Then I came back out of there and realized that I had this creepy creepy freak following me online. Stalker freakyness. Not much I can do about that but block them. Then I got sick and almost went back down there. What am I doing in hell in the first place, I should totally be in heaven. Then I called awesomely awesome, but equally crazy big brother who is 2 years younger than me, yes I mean Stan, not Jake. Then we talked about Grimmjow and Ichigo, and yes, they will happen. The point is, I have no inspiration to write. My life is boring, unless you want to hear all about church meeting, and calculus. Oh I mean Vectors. Or Wectors according to some people I know... yes is funny. But alas, it is the end of March Break, I have a sore throat and nothing else to do. Actually I have a ton of chemistry homework but don't tell my awesome chem teacher that. Damn he's awesome. I need to do laundry, clean my room and open my windows. I hate this stupid crazy weatherness. Then I will do homework, then excerise and try to get in shape for prom. Yes I will. Somehow. Heaven help me I will!!!

So yea, that felt good. I will go and do all that now, and then when I feel like writing actual writing I will be back. I promise you. Alright. Maybe I'll take a shower first.